Solution-focused therapy encourages forward progression in several ways, one of which is to look for past successes (and exceptions to the problem) and build off of those. In goal setting and achievement I encourage my clients to consider the smallest change they can make immediately, as well as the very first, smallest sign of progress they will notice. We are most likely to achieve and maintain large goals in small steps, undertaking one at a time, rather than trying to create an entirely new life or way of being over night.

In general people do not pay enough attention to how successful and powerful they actually are already. Preparing a healthy lunch rather than stopping at Taco Bell just one day is a major change for that day. A smaller change would be to go to the same eating establishment, but order lighter fare instead of the usual.

While watching an older episode of The Biggest Loser, I heard something amazing, something I’d never really thought about before. While counseling a contestant, Jillian Michaels said that you can be so afraid of your success that you sabotage your weight loss, thereby ensuring that you won’t be successful. Whoa. And, huh?

And, yeah, right on. Especially if you are a mom. Think about it. Moms are conditioned, from before the baby arrives to put the baby first. Think of the baby, do what’s best for the baby. In the beginning, of course, there is a lot of validity to this sentiment. But babies grow up, change and become interested in other things, and moms often stay in the same position, stagnant and directionless. It is an almost martyrdom, placing the wants and needs of every other member of the family above hers. In a far too often scenario, this leads to weight gain. And then the vicious cycle begins.

How do you jump the hurdle of self-doubt? If you do not believe a goal is achievable it will appear to be a wall rather than a hurdle. For my friend staying away from fast food seemed to be an impossibility. Fast food is readily available, easy, and relatively inexpensive. To avoid it might require him to spend more, drive further, learn to cook, or depend on others. It might also require some advanced planning to purchase and prepare food before one wants to eat. Beyond all that is the familiarity and comfort derived from such options.

He could have resolved one day not to eat fast food ever again, looked up several new healthy recipes, gone to the grocery and bought all the ingredients; however, my guess is that after a week or so he would be looking for a break from all that cooking or disappointed in his skill or time management. Going to the grocery may seem overwhelming when you don’t know where everything is or even what you really want.

Changing your life is a process, undertaken one step at a time. I have written previously about why drastic changes like New Years Resolutions fail. Some steps toward change are too big to maintain. Lifestyle and dietary habits are often so ingrained that it can require a redefinition of yourself to make that change. It is important for success not to jump in over your head, but to consciously walk through each step of your journey.

Even when we take each step individually, some steps can feel like a longer reach than others. A friend who has been reading my posts at Diets In Review shared with me recently that in his struggle to lose weight the biggest hurdle was not finding new information on nutrition and exercise that could help direct his behavior or modify his metabolism or even avoiding the temptation of his comfort foods, but rather the most difficult part for him was believing that he could actually make it over those hurdles. Self-doubt is a hurdle in itself.

Mini-marathon participants running through downtown Indianapolis.

In just under seven weeks, I will be running the Indianapolis Mini-Marathon for the second time. Part of the events leading up to the Indianapolis 500 each year, the Mini-Marathon is the largest half-marathon and the fifth largest running event in the United States. It is a major event for Indianapolis, including participants from all over the world, across age brackets, and of all speeds. I have fast new shoes and I am running more days than I’m not. I obviously have running on the brain. We write about the health benefits of running frequently, but there are several mental health benefits also.

1. Run when you are feeling angry or frustrated to burn off the extra energy. Research has shown that nothing relieves stress more than physical exercise.

2. Running increases endorphins which contributes to a general sense of well-being and mood elevation, so running can make you feel better when you are sad.