With the holiday season barrelling down, we know you’re going to be dusting off those Christmas classics and watching them around the warm glow of the tree. Did you know that besides giving you the giggles, making you feel warm and fuzzy, and providing your family with a slew of quotes to lob at each other – You’ll shoot your eye out, kid! – your favorite movies can also serve as a holiday dieting guide? In most cases, it’s a an example for what not to eat, but still, so much fun to watch.
Holiday Dieting Guide – Christmas Movie Style
We elves try to stick to the four main food groups: candy, candy canes, candy corns and syrup.
Michelle Obama would not approve. In Elf, Will Ferrell’s diet was every child’s dream but someone really needs to introduce him to the new My Plate rules.
Clark: Where is Eddie? He usually eats these &%$#-ing things. Catherine: Not recently, Clark. He read that squirrels were high in cholesterol.
A Christmas Story
Show mommy how the piggies eat.
His mother may have gotten Ralphie’s brother to eat his “meatloaf beatloaf” this way, but we don’t recommend these table manners at Christmas dinner.
How The Grinch Stole Christmas
Then he slunk to the ice box. He took the Whos’ feast, he took the Who pudding, he took the roast beast. He cleaned out that ice box as quick as a flash. Why, the Grinch even took their last can of Who hash.
I’ve never had “Who Hash” but I bet Turkey Hash is better for you.
The Santa Clause
And I’ll have a Caesar. No dressing. And one of those homemade cookies, the warm chocolate chip. No nuts. And a little slice of cheesecake. Uh, crème brulee, and, um, hot fudge sundae, extra hot fudge.
A lovely cheese pizza just for me.
Christmas With the Kranks
Luther Krank: Smoked trout? Nora Krank: It’s better than frozen pizza. Luther Krank: What happened to the hickory honey ham? Nora Krank: Don’t EVER say hickory honey ham again.
Brad’s brother can eat chicken wings and drink beer while killing it in a family game of Taboo. Dude! Those are probably drenched in a fat-laden sauce. Keep your game face on and eat these wings instead.
Salmon is good for you. We just don’t recommend eating it through a dirty Santa beard on the subway.
You know what I want to do? I want to eat carbs without wanting to kill myself.
Before Sgt. Powell befriended John McClane and helped him defeat the German terrorists who hijacked a perfectly nice Christmas party, he was just a heartsick cop who wanted to eat an armload of Twinkies in peace.
Ohhh, Sgt. Powell, no wonder you’re sad. Twinkies are bad for you. Eat a fistful of these Vanilla Almond Cookies instead.
The Muppet Christmas Carol
Gonzo: Hello! Welcome to the Muppet Christmas Carol! I am here to tell the story. Rizzo the Rat: And I am here for the food.
Honestly, Rizzo, who isn’t?
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer
Yukon Cornelius: This fog’s as thick as peanut butter! Hermey: You mean pea soup. Yukon Cornelius: You eat what you like, and I’ll eat what I like!
The Family Stone – Before she was accidentally covered in it, Meredith originally planned to share her Strata (a Morton family tradition). In the spirit of family togetherness, new traditions and breakfast casseroles a-plenty, we’re sharing the Morton family recipe with you.
- 8 slices white bread
- 8 ounces mozzarella cheese, sliced
- 14 ounces sliced tomatoes
- 13 ounces sliced mushrooms, drained (or sauteed fresh)
- 1 medium onion, thinly sliced into rings
- 5 eggs
- 3 cups milk
- 1 teaspoon salt
- 1 teaspoon oregano
- 1 pinch garlic salt
- Parmesan cheese
- Black olives, sliced
- Using a cookie cutter, donut cutter or lid from a jar, cut bread into shapes or circles. Set aside.
- Place bread scraps in bottom of buttered 13″ by 9″ baking dish. Layer half of the cheese over bread.
- Arrange half of the tomatoes and all of the onion rings and mushrooms over the cheese. Cover with the rest of the cheese.
- Arrange the bread shapes on the cheese. Put slices of the tomato in the center of each bread shape.
- Combine slightly beaten eggs, milk, salt, oregano and garlic salt. Pour over the bread.
- Sprinkle with Parmesan cheese and dot with olives.
- Cover. Refrigerate for 6 hours or overnight.
- Bake 1-1/2 hours in a 325 degree oven, or until knife comes out clean. Let stand for 5 minutes or until firm.