Do you love to throw parties or have your friends over for an evening? I do! I am what some people call a social butterfly. I love having people around at all times if possible. I think for so long I steered away from genuinely connecting with people that I might be trying to make up for lost time.
When I struggled with my weight it had such a profound impact on how I felt about myself and what I was or was not creating in my life that I stopped having intimate conversations with my friends and family because I couldn’t bare risking that they might see exactly how I truly felt. What I didn’t realize was that I wasn’t very good at hiding it, but that’s an entirely different conversation.
I was good, however, at declining social invitations, working overtime, doing projects for others, and staying so busy that I didn’t have time to really connect with the people in my life that loved me and cared about me.
As I started to reconnect with myself and tell the truth about exactly where I was in my life, and felt that my life meant something, I realized that I had missed out on so much. My fear of having others see how I felt about myself stopped me from really being there and knowing them. Plain and simple, this realization was unacceptable.
I have always been one to think that the quality of ones life is not determined by how many things they acquire or awards they receive but how real their relationships are. I would much rather want to get to know someone who might have fewer people in their life but really complete, solid relationships with them than with that person who knows everyone and no one at the same time. I realized I needed to get to know my friends and family again.
I think it’s funny how so many of us in the U.S. connect intimacy with nurturing and nurturing with food. I knew that with some of the important people in my life I would be able to reconnect and really get to know them again while running, walking, spinning or a number of other physical activities, but not all of them.
I found myself in many situations where people wanted to meet up for dinner or go out for a drink. I quickly found myself being distracted by all the factors of whether or not I would find something in my calorie range or if I was going to have to give in a little to be able to share the time with those that I loved. There were decisions to make and factors to consider so that all our needs could be met so that neither of us had to feel like we were being asked to compromise what was important to us.
What did I do? I started becoming the host! By me being the one to have people over for dinner and throwing the parties I was able to control the situation and provide suitable alternatives to everyone’s needs. This allowed for everyone to be able to fully relax and only be concerned with sharing time with each other.
Check out Live Big With Ali Vincent this week where I throw a premier party all with low calorie appetizers and cocktails!
Until next week enjoy your family and be true to yourself,
September 27th, 2013